That's What Friends Are There For
by Nomen Ist Omen
Summary: In which Shikamaru -- unwillingly -- acts as a relationship counsellor.


**That's What Friends Are There For**

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

_Author's Notes:_

This is a repost, basically. I deleted it, thinking this piece wasn't worth being here, but after re-reading it, I thought it wasn't as bad. I've written much, much worse before. This is still a Naruto/Sasuke (or the other way around; whatever rocks your world) fic, only told from Shikamaru's POV. I had tons of fun writing this, and hope you'll derive some momentary enjoyment from it as well.

Anyhow, honest criticism would be loved.

...

Most of the people think I do nothing when staring up at the clouds. Well, this isn't necessarily true. Just because I don't sweat like a pig while doing what I like doing best doesn't mean that I'm not engaged in some way. However, that's just the curse of living in an environment which values physical activity over the straining of braincells. Not that it perturbs me greatly.

Meaning, that I don't and shouldn't expect people to understand. This doesn't strike me as sad, though. I've come to accept this, like I accept and understand that women are aggressive, domineering and really too hot to handle for any man. And yet, impossible to live without. So, I'm more than certain that I'll marry and have kids of my own one day because that's the way things are (and I have no problem with that).

When I look up the sky, the clouds and observe the way they shift in shape, grow smaller and then larger as if being puffed up and then squashed by an invisible hand, I think. Yes, and that is an activity because it's much harder to just let go yourself in that way than people believe. Losing yourself in menial tasks is easy, but focusing on a particular chain of thoughts is harder – because pondering over things can be thrilling, yet terrifying at the same time.

I see what the future holds in store for Konoha, do realise that one fine day all this here – the ninja way of life, the politics governing the village are going to crumble into dust. Not because the system is bad, but because that's just the way it is. People, needs and opinions change – nothing ever remains the same. Yet, by then, I'll be dead – long dead – and it won't come to trouble me.

You'd perhaps think I should reveal those things to others, even if I'd be faced with scorn, scepticism and whatnot. But I don't care to: people don't like changes. And who am I to rob them off their illusions?

Besides, it's that's not important. And I'm not looking for attention. I'm fine with being who I am. Leading a peaceful life is more than good enough for me – and what I like doing best is what others refer to as "daydreaming".

...

I'm doing just that – the daydreaming thing -- when the unspeakable happens; a loud – and eliciting gruff sounds of spit coursing my way – voice interrupts my thoughts, breaking down like a storm of thunder upon me. Of course, it's Naruto. No one else but him would be that inconsiderate, even though he doesn't do it consciously. It's not his fault he's hyper and a bundle of energy.

"Say, what are you always thinking about?" he asks, genuinely curious.

"Nothing," I reply quickly and hope he'll disappear soon. It's not that I'm angry, but more frustrated.

I'd been hoping to have some peace and quiet after escaping the all too-demanding presence of the women in my life. Temari left to visit her brother and Mother, for once, is too busy with some domestic scandal to pay any attention to what I'm up to. I think it was something about the middle-aged neighbour having an affair with a girl around my age. Whatever.

I came here to escape it, but to no avail. And Naruto won't quit chattering.

"Hey, are you going to talk? Say something, damnit!"

"Too annoyin'. Go away."

I squint when Naruto stoops over me. His face blocking the clouds from my view. It's bothersome and I grumble, muttering my trademark phrase, hoping that will make him go away.

He doesn't, but smiles broadly and shakes his head.

"Stop being such a grimy old git. You haven't even got wrinkles yet," Naruto says playfully and then surprises me by sitting down beside me, or rather lying down in the grass. He doesn't do it quietly, not like Chouji, who in spite of his body build, doesn't plop down the floor like a bag filled with potatoes. Naruto, of course, not only plops down, but spreads in all angles and starts humming audibly, not being able to remain quiet for a sheer second.

"So what do you want, Naruto?" I ask, hoping that this will make Naruto to stop that horrendous humming noise.

It's not hard to guess what he wants. I'm not naïve enough to believe that he's come here to watch clouds; Naruto hasn't got the attention span nor the patience for that kind of thing.

"Shikarmaru...have you ever..."

"Yes?" I demand cautiously. It's kind of odd to see Naruto being that restrained; he's not that high-strung usually.

He pauses, hesitates and starts to chew on his lower lip, frowning all the while.

"How do you someone get to go out with you?" Naruto mutters all too quickly, as if he'd swallowed a fly and were trying to spit it out. He's lucky that I've got sharp ears and don't have to ask him to repeat what he's just said.

There's a moment of silence, and I swallow audibly. This is just too vexing, really. I don't know why Naruto came to see me, of all things. I haven't got "relationship counsellor" plastered on my forehead, do I?

"Um, Naruto...no offence meant, but why are you asking _me_ this?"

Naruto frowns and bites his lips, seriously pondering over that question.

"Well, you've got a girlfriend and I need some kind of male advice – male advice is useful. Besides, Sakura's got enough."

He doesn't need to tell me more. He probably annoyed Haruno so much until she cracked and punched him in the head. As for the other male candidates he might have asked, ... oh well. With Lee being way too optimistic, Sai borderline insane, Kiba reducing everything to the very primal needs of a human-being, Neji and Shino not even being options to ask for advice, it really does seem like I'm the only who can help him. Well, Chouji might have helped him out as well, but the poor guy probably never even crossed Naruto's mind. Then again, I'd rather spare Chouji the pain of having to listen to Naruto's various dilemmas, thank you very much.

"So how did you do it?" Naruto now probes, unconsciously creeping closer to me, which makes me shift in position, just so I don't have to smell his ramen-infested breath. Besides, this invading of personal privacy makes me slightly jittery and I'm already nervous enough. Because I just know I can't escape Naruto now.

I sigh again before responding because all of this – Naruto's reaction – is predictable: he'll be incredulous, deny everything and then ask me to reaffirm what he's heard about me.

"I don't know."

"But you had to confess to Temari somehow!"

"I didn't."

"What do you mean you didn't ?! You're going out, aren't you?"

If going out means that you get a female to yell and drag you through crowded streets just to buy some stupid dress, a new pair of shoes or a necklace, then I guess, yeah, that's what you call going on. Furthermore, if it means that said female comes over to your place practically every weekend just to reorganise the mess in your room, ask you whether she's gained a few pounds or not on regular basis and then lashes out like a bulldog on you when you tell her she did, then yeah...I guess that's called being in a relationship. All in all, a very tiring sort of experience, if you ask me.

I can see that Naruto's impatient for an answer and realise that I'll just have to say it, although it's really more than stupid.

"Yes. But I never did anything. Temari just stormed into my house, dragged me out of bed and ordered me to go shopping with her. That's pretty much what we've been doing since then."

He gives me a "you're kidding me look", but I ignore it. I could tell Naruto that there are a couple of other things we do, and that I don't really mind having Temari around me, but I'm not in the mood. Besides, it's none of his business, and I don't want to be pestered any further about me and Temari.

Thankfully, that seems to be enough for Naruto. Unfortunately, he can't keep his mouth shut.

"Whatever, look...I've got this friend and we've known each other for ages, only that whenever I look at him, or my elbow brushes up against his, I feel that spark – it's like I'm on fire and my stomach is full of bu-"

"Get to the point".

It's not that I hate Naruto, but I just had to cut in. If he was going to start talking about butterflies and a roller-coaster emotions than I'd have started to develop a nervous tick. It's already painful enough as it is. I don't need more of this nonsense.

"Well, I just like him."

_Him?_ It only takes me about a second to understand who Naruto's talking about and, honestly, it doesn't take a genius to figure it out. Because there's only one person that can make Naruto act like this -- make him feel all nervous, tongue-tied and anxious. And it isn't Sai, even though he'd be a better candidate than the one Naruto's so infatuated with.

"So know you want to show Sasuke how you feel about him, but are too scared?"

The mention of Sasuke's name from my lips makes Naruto's eyes widen for an instant. He didn't expect me to know, but gets over his surprise quickly. He does me quite well, after all.

"Everything else I tried, failed."

"Go on, Naruto."

"I've tried by flirting, giving him suggestive looks, but Sasuke-idiot thought I had stomach cramps or something. Then, while sparring, I'd pummel him while straddling his lap, but Sasuke just reacted like he always does – he'd just punch me."

"What else?"

"I crept into his mansion at night, crawled into bed with him and – well, ended up getting nearly killed...I didn't know Sasuke was that touchy."

I slap myself against the forehead; he's really that kind of an idiot. Naruto doesn't seem to understand that anyone – and I really mean anyone – would have reacted like this. I mean, having people barge into your bedroom at night isn't exactly on people's list of the mostly highly anticipated events. But ... yeah, this is Naruto we're talking about.

"But you know, even if he did beat me black and blue, he just looked gorgeous in the glow of the moonlight – his skin was-"

Enough, enough – I don't need to hear _that_. I interrupt Naruto before he can continue.

"Naruto, why don't you simply tell him how you feel?" I ask, my head buzzing from the overload of useless information I've just received: there should a limit to such unabashed stupidity and immaturity.

Naruto's white in the face; the mere thought of doing what I've suggested seems to bring out the coward in him. Surprising – I hadn't thought that Naruto was so paranoid about this. I'd have pegged him for the direct type.

"Are you crazy?" he yells, again way too close -- I move away before he can scream my ears raw.

I feel that my eyebrows are furrowed and that the muscles in my head are pulsing, but I rub my temples, which lessens the pain. Still, this is vexing. I really shouldn't have gone out of the house today. Even my mother's bitching and complaints about my father's lack of motivation are better than this.

"Naruto, the only way to really find out what he feels is to tell him."

"And what if I get rejected?"

I want to sputter something rude like "well, that's the way of life. Grow used to it", but the words just won't come out. Besides, Naruto's like an open book, baring out his feelings of insecurity and anxiety and he's not really the happiest of people now. So, I don't see the point of rubbing salt into his wound.

"That's just a risk you'll have to take -" I say, holding up my hand, so Naruto won't interrupt me," But it's better than saying nothing at all."

Naruto grins slightly and nods. Afterwards, he slowly rises from the grass and sets out to do what he has to do. Before leaving, he utters a quick "thank you".

I shake my head and mutter: "That's what friends are there for."

...

My head still throbs painfully after Naruto's gone. I should get going as well, even though I don't particularly feel like it. However, it's past six and if I don't show up before sunset, there'll be hell to pay. Yes, being screamed at and having to listen to a never-ending lecture on propriety is hell.

So, I walk quickly, heedless of anything else. It's stupid, but I also find myself preoccupied, thinking of Naruto and his not so little problem. How troublesome.

And, of course, the very person I bump into is Sasuke, looking as dismal and self-absorbed as he always does. Others might describe him as having an aura of beauty, effulgence and what do I know what, but for me he's only a boy with a sour and ever angry look on his face.

He doesn't even greet, but simply nods and is ready to walk on, probably regarding me as insignificant and not worthy of being talked to – which isn't something I care about. I don't care what people think of me. I don't need glory or acknowledgement, especially not Sasuke's.

This time, it's different, though. So, I find myself speaking to him, not saying "good evening" either, but getting straight to the point. Anything else, wouldn't work with him.

"Sasuke, I have to talk you."

He huffs in irritation and I find myself recoiling from him, not because I'm scared or intimidated. It's just troublesome. Sasuke is even more difficult to deal with than Naruto. I can't say that I'm awed over his social skills; he's harder to crack than a nut. But I need him to listen.

"What?" he asks me, his voice cool and calm, but that's only a façade – a carefully concealed warning telling me not to waste his time.

"Look, I'll make this short and sweet: Naruto is going to try and confess that he likes you today. Or, sometime, in the near future."

Sasuke is quiet. There's no outburst of emotions or a surprised, breathless gasp, but he's like he always is. At least, it seems so on the outside, but it doesn't fool me.

There's something in the tightening of his chin, the alertness in his eyes and chewing of his lips that betrays him. He doesn't have to say anything. Sasuke is affected. He doesn't want to be, fights the emotions in him like you'd battle a migraine, but it's there, nevertheless.

Of course, it is. Last time I checked Sasuke Uchiha was a human and no human can avoid feeling something in some way. Especially if it involves someone close to him.

Really, it's so aggravating to watch him try to suppress it all.

"And what should I do about it?" Sasuke inquires flippantly, his eyes observing my face intently, with a scrutiny that would make anyone else back away.

I just sigh.

"Don't make it harder for him. If he comes to confess to you, don't make him regret it. If you have to break his heart, do it kindly."

Not that heartbreak is ever kind. I just don't want him to stomp over Naruto's feelings. God knows, he's suffered more than enough on Sasuke's account: he doesn't need any more crap from him.

"And what if I don't?"

It's not really a question. Sasuke isn't an idiot, but I know he'll need to hear it expressed verbally. It's a challenge, really. He's challenging me to defy him, not to shrink away from him.

I'm not scared, but annoyed: Sasuke's is the one who's not worth my time. Really.

"Look, I don't give a damn about you or the Weltschmerz issues of yours, Sasuke," I start, watching how his face remains impassive, evidently unaffected by what I think of him, but it's not like I care. I'm doing this for Naruto, not Sasuke,"..But Naruto's my friend – a really good friend of mine. If I see that you'll hurt him unnecessarily, you'll regret it."

Of course, I mean what I say – every word of it. Naruto, for all his antics and recklessness, is a fantastic person with a heart of gold. I' might sigh and grumble when he's around, but it doesn't mean that I don't like having him around. Sure, he's not Chouji, but not one could be Chouji. Still, Naruto is Naruto and I like him for being that.

I walk away after that, thinking that my job here is done and that there's nothing left to be said. Now, it's up to Sasuke to take up the reins and do whatever he thinks is appropriate.

...

After the insane and more than troublesome events of today, I meet up with Chouji and Ino, grateful to relax in their company. Chouji is his usual self, munching away at the food remains that I've left him, which isn't a big deal. I wasn't hungry, anyway.

Of course – now that everything has relapsed into relaxedness again -- Naruto just has to come storming in, his cheeks flushed from the activity of running and his eyes blazing wildly.

And then, out of nowhere, he pulls me into a fierce bear hug, lets me ago as quickly and then slaps me – a little too hardly -- on the back. Meanwhile, Ino and Chouji exchange looks of bewildered surprise. I can't blame them.

"It worked, Shikamaru. It worked. You're the best!"

With that, he storms off again, leaving me in that state of mild irritation that makes me shake my head yet again. Naruto is quite bit of work, though he's an entertaining bit of work.

"Say, what was that about?" Ino asks, scratching her hair and looking at Naruto's hastily departing silhouette fading away.

"Yeah, why is Naruto all that excited?" Chouji demands, knowing that I've got something to do with this; he's one of the few people to know me that well.

I just shrug my shoulders and feel that, despite everything, there's a smile forming on my face. Perhaps, I'm just a little relieved and happy for Naruto – not only because he won't bother about his confession blues anymore.

Ino and Chouji are still expecting some sort of answer, so I'll humour them a little. Even if it won't satisfy them entirely, but I've reached my limit of benevolence for today.

"He's always excited -- you know him."

I could tell them -- certainly, but don't feel like it. Besides, it's something to be reserved for another day.  
...


End file.
